Protest for rights, March, demands, laws implementation by the government cannot change the mentality of people. Yes, sometimes a community gets their rights but it only happens when the rights are in government hands. So you can demand it, protest it and become successful in getting it.
People come out on roads to protest or to demand rights. What compels these people to come out on roads, protest and beaten up by the opposite group or sometimes by the police? Is it really related to something justified or are these kinds of groups try to create havoc in society?
I know very well, similar kind of incidents that happen in Pakistan occur globally (more or less). However, in my opinion, when there is something problematic in my own country, I do not need to talk about or compare situations with other countries.
In the context of Pakistan and the recent non-stop argument regarding Women protest on roads, I thought what good this protest will do in favor of all those women that actually need them all.
Here I want to share why I think these kinds of protests or demanding rights cannot change the condition of society or the situation of those women who need it.
Firstly, it is easy to get rights if it is a demand from the government. People block roads, go on hunger strikes, threaten to freeze the system to get the rights from the government and many times they are successful. However, in the case of women’s rights or even human rights, the government has the least to do with it.
- The government of Pakistan did not ban girls’ education or put restrictions on women to do jobs. They are free to do it. I do not know about other departments, but the education department has more vacancies of the female teachers than males. The amusing fact is many times women also get selected on men’s seats because they have permission to apply on men’s seats too.
However, government cannot attack people’s houses and forcefully drag girls out of their houses. They cannot compel their parents or their brothers to allow them to go to school or to jobs. They can simply make them understand, but it is their thinking and their free will, whether they want to do it or not.
- The government of Pakistan has passed various bills regarding women harassment, cyber bullies, sexual assaults, etc. Is this really effective?
No, most of the time and in most places, it is not. The reason is, women are afraid to go to report against any man. Firstly, they will be asked questions like how, why and when. She has to tell in front of a number of males how she has gone through the assault. Here I am even not talking about rape. I know to testify is necessary, as there are women who play the victim card and put allegation on men.
The fact is police do not have a good reputation. If I tell you my thinking about them, on roads, I even do not want to look at them (because of unknown fear). The reason is numerous incidents where the police themselves rape/ sexually assault the victim. So people think its better not to go to them. Secondly, who will be there when some criminal will attack back to take revenge?
The most important factor is the thinking of people, who will blame women, in the end, no matter what. If someone harasses some women on road, and she protests, the crowd will eventually blame her. The sane will ask her to go because this is the best thing you can do. In short, every wrong deed whether it is done to women, people think it is because of women.
- The government of Pakistan has put laws against dowry, to give a share to daughter in inheritance and to put restrictions on wedding day ceremonies. However, government officials cannot stop people, because after the wedding they will not be there when a girl will be beaten or listen to all curses because of not bringing huge dowry with her. Government officials cannot be there when a girl is threatened by her family to leave her if she will ask her to share.
My point is if the thinking of people cannot change, no protest can do any good.
Protest cannot stop someone to not beating their wives, because wives know they do not have any place to go after complaining against their husband and who will look after their children.
Protest cannot stop someone to control their hands and tongue while walking on roads or working with women. Protest cannot stop someone from raping, sexually assaulting.
These protests can make the government think about announcing punishments against all crimes however it cannot change people’s thinking and morals.
The Change will not possible with Protest for rights but only:
- When we teach our sons by making them sit with their sisters.
- The change will occur when we teach our sons that wrong is wrong even if men do it.
- When we will show equally concerns and no let go in sons’ matter that oh boys are like this.
- when we will teach our sons that your dignity will also lose if you will chase a girl, harass her with your eyes, hands or words. You cannot cheat a girl or use her, because it will lower your value too.
- When we will teach our sons women are women whether she belongs to your home or not. As it is a common sight that mostly men respect their women but outside of their homes, they just turn into beasts.
- When we will not hesitate to teach our sons how to treat a woman on wedding nights. (in context of some incidents that actually lead to women serious injury)
- When we will teach them that the way your ego gets hurt, women’s ego is equally hurt.
- When we will teach our sons that no matter what you cannot abuse a woman verbally pr physically. Have you ever seen a man who beat his boss, because he got some issue with him? No, because he cannot risk losing his job and because he thinks he is his superior. Then why sometimes they give the lame excuse that I could not control my anger. If you can control your anger at some special occasions, then you think the woman is weak and she cannot beat you back. so it is easy for you to take out your anger on her.
The most important thing is these all have nothing to do with education too. There are many uneducated men who treat their women like queens and there are many educated men who beat their women and treat her like trash. It all depends on how all their lives they have seen their fathers treat their mother or how their parents taught them to talk to or behave with a woman.
It is also a lame excuse that men are born like this way, no they are not. They are brought up like this way.
Here the argument is not about the percentage of bad men or women. Here the thing is you are responsible for your morality, ethics, religion, upbringing and while dealing with someone, you should not lower your level. If you get angry at something and cannot control your anger, just leave the place.
Many times it also happens that to destroy a man’s home, his mother and sister contribute. I never said that it is always the man who is wrong. But in most cases it is. Because since his childhood he has always seen a difference and the treatment of women. If a man sees his father who respects his mother and gives value to her, then there are fewer chances that he will mistreat a woman.
It is not a war between men and women. Its neither about sustaining women superiority over men or else wise. These all are necessary to make a home peaceful as well as society.
